I've been browsing through Web today while doing a little research and I've found an interesting article from musician Carl King, which I think is worth reading.
Well, being focused inwards rather than outwards is quite a common thing among people with artistic inclinations*, so I think I can find quite a few people here who'd be interested to read about what it means being one and also what are misconceptions that people have about Introverts - which I think the author got relatively well.
Also, I don't think that it's too much of a shocker if I'd admit to being an Introvert myself and rather big one at that (but it's best to view Introversion and Extroversion as a continuum - it's not that there's a fine line that separates one from another, people can be more or less Introverted or Extroverted).
Still, even among people closest to me I think there are things they're not getting about what does it mean being Introverted... heck - there are things I myself didn't realize and keep learning about it, so perhaps it's best if we discussed the topic a bit, hmm?
Anyway, you can find the whole article under this link [link]
, I'll only focus on 10 myths themselves and add my own thoughts in brackets:Myth #1 Introverts don't like to talk.
This is not true. Introverts just don't talk unless they have something to say. They hate small talk. Get an introvert talking about something they are interested in, and they won't shut up for days.
(truuuuue, so true. Give me a topic I'm interested in and I'll ramble about it for hours or days. At the same time I might be awkwardly silent or stiff when there's really nothing to talk about)Myth #2 Introverts are shy.
Shyness has nothing to do with being an Introvert. Introverts are not necessarily afraid of people. What they need is a reason to interact. They don't interact for the sake of interacting. If you want to talk to an Introvert, just start talking. Don't worry about being polite.
(In my case it's really a matter of mood I'm in. There are days when I have no problem with interaction and there are days when it comes with difficulty)Myth #3 Introverts are rude.
Introverts often don't see a reason for beating around the bush with social pleasantries. They want everyone to just be real and honest. Unfortunately, this is not acceptable in most settings, so Introverts can feel a lot of pressure to fit in, which they find exhausting.
(I don't consider myself being rude, but I do think I have a somewhat thicker skin than most and there were moments when I was told I've been somewhat... hmm... insensitive?, when it really mattered for me to get the point across. All in all, I value honesty more than sugar-coating things I want to say, though I don't necessarily accept having no manners during conversation)Myth #4 Introverts don't like people.
On the contrary, Introverts intensely value the few friends they have. They can count their close friends on one hand. If you are lucky enough for an introvert to consider you a friend, you probably have a loyal ally for life. Once you have earned their respect as being a person of substance, you're in.
(I have nothing to say here other than yes - I have a small group of friends I value a lot and I don't really feel the need to significantly expand this group... which doesn't mean that I don't like expanding it at all
)Myth #5 Introverts don't like to go out in public.
Nonsense. Introverts just don't like to go out in public FOR AS LONG. They also like to avoid the complications that are involved in public activities. They take in data and experiences very quickly, and as a result, don't need to be there for long to "get it." They're ready to go home, recharge, and process it all. In fact, recharging is absolutely crucial for Introverts.
(very much true. I don't necessarily avoid going out in public at all costs, but it's relatively easy for me to become overwhelmed. Best case scenario for me, personally, is go out in public, find a small group of friends and then find a cozy niche somewhere for the rest of the day or go out for a walk and fill it with conversation or just general goofing around, without necessarily looking forward to participating in activities planned for larger group of people, even if they're main events on some parties, conventions or else. And yes, I do have to recharge after that - going too long without unwinding exhausts me mentally) Myth #6 Introverts always want to be alone.
Introverts are perfectly comfortable with their own thoughts. They think a lot. They daydream. They like to have problems to work on, puzzles to solve. But they can also get incredibly lonely if they don't have anyone to share their discoveries with. They crave an authentic and sincere connection with ONE PERSON at a time.
(very much true for me. It doesn't necessarily have to be ONE PERSON!, but it definitely won't be a big crowd of people)Myth #7 Introverts are weird.
Introverts are often individualists. They don't follow the crowd. They'd prefer to be valued for their novel ways of living. They think for themselves and because of that, they often challenge the norm. They don't make most decisions based on what is popular or trendy.
(True. 'Popular', 'trendy' or 'typical' stuff often bores me, although I don't necessarily avoid them at all cost, as I'm not interested in being a contrarian either. If popular or typical stuff happens to align with what I like - fine. And I definitely don't mind people following trends... well, okay, it doesn't bother me as much as it might some other people, but I do think there are limits, as there are to basically everything)Myth #8 Introverts are aloof nerds.
Introverts are people who primarily look inward, paying close attention to their thoughts and emotions. It's not that they are incapable of paying attention to what is going on around them, it's just that their inner world is much more stimulating and rewarding to them.
(true, although in a sense
I do like knowing what's going on around the world or in my environment, although I definitely look more inwards or spend a lot of time on analyzing things that people don't spend that much time thinking about, as they prefer to spend that time focusing on everyday life and its problems)Myth #9 Introverts don't know how to relax and have fun.
Introverts typically relax at home or in nature, not in busy public places. Introverts are not thrill seekers and adrenaline junkies. If there is too much talking and noise going on, they shut down. Their brains are too sensitive to the neurotransmitter called Dopamine. Introverts and Extroverts have different dominant neuro-pathways. Just look it up.
(what the author is talking about is that there is evidence suggesting the differences between how brains of Introverted and Extroverted people work. I encourage people to look it up themselves, but I don't think I have to mention that you should refrain from forming conclusions too fast. As I mentioned before - Introversion and Extroversion should be looked up as a spectrum and it's not that differences are too significant or extreme between individuals identified as more Extrovert or more Introvert. Also - neither Extroversion or Introversion are a condition of any sort
, they're mental orientations and both are perfectly normal.
Also - when it comes to myself, yes, my definition of 'relaxing' or 'having fun' doesn't necessarily match the definition many other people have, but it's not that I don't appreciate a good adrenaline kick from time to time
)Myth #10 Introverts can fix themselves and become Extroverts.
A world without Introverts would be a world with few scientists, musicians, artists, poets, filmmakers, doctors, mathematicians, writers, and philosophers. That being said, there are still plenty of techniques an Extrovert can learn in order to interact with Introverts. (...) Introverts cannot "fix themselves" and deserve respect for their natural temperament and contributions to the human race. In fact, one study (Silverman, 1986) showed that the percentage of Introverts increases with IQ.
There are a few rather bold statements above and they reflect author's take on the matter. I'm definitely yet to check if there is a correlation between IQ and being an Introvert - I'm not so sure, considering the variety of individuals and levels of how people are Intro- or Extroverted, not to mention that today we know that there are many types of intelligence.
As for me - I don't necessarily look up at being Introverted as something special... I simply am an Introvert. That's how I am.
Is it true that current culture values Extroverted people more then Introverted or looks down on Introverted as weirdos or people with stunted social skills?
Hmm, I suppose it's a bit more complicated than this, but it definitely gets tiring when people try to force me into "going out more", thinking it'll solve some of my issues or don't understand that I simply do need time, more intimate setting or more weighty topics to discuss in order to become more social.
I don't necessarily demand for the world to adjust to me - I get that I need to do some adjusting myself, it's just that I do things a little bit differently than majority does, considering that Introverted people ARE an actual minority, which is why some misconceptions or misunderstandings have arose.
Anyway - I hope you'll find this an interesting read... although very long, I know ^_^; and if you have any thoughts on it, please share in comments *you might be interested in checking this video too [link] as well as this short article [link]